good times.

It's times like these that make me so grateful of the good happy times I have had with people I love. times when I'm sick and sitting in bed bored out of my mind but not able to fall asleep that I think of the fun times I've had and fun times I will have. I always have to remember that I should never take for granted the time I spend with people I love.

I'm so blessed in my life, and I need to be constantly reminded of that. Yes, I've gone through some down-right shitty things, but that's only in my opinion, and only at the time that I'm going through it. Because after the fact, basically after I've gotten over myself, I realize how much worse off people are. There are children losing parents, losing legs, dying of sickness, people getting shot, losing their income and houses, losing hope and heart, and there I was, crying over a break-up.

I feel so selfish when I go through these kind of things and whine about it, but sometimes you have to be. I'm not justifying my self-pity but I'm not denying it. Sometimes in order to heal yourself, you need to take time for yourself. However much time that is, you'll know. You'll know when things are fixed, or better, or you'll know when you need more time, more space. Whatever it is, you'll know.

I guess when I have time to think, I usually take time to put things in perspective. Yes, sometimes I just take some time to whine to myself, and pity myself. But when the dust has cleared it just makes me realize that tomorrow is still going to come. You can whine as much as you want, but it's going to happen. It's your choice to make that day good or bad. You have the option of staying positive and keeping yourself out of a rut. No matter what people say you have the ability to ignore the bad stuff and let yourself be who you want to be. I mean, certainly it's easier said than done, and I'm the last one to take my own advice. But really, if I just stepped back and looked at everything, I'd realize how much better off I'd be if I chose to make things better for myself.

Of course I can let people dictate my own future, but I have so much more power than them when it comes to me. I know me. I know who I am, how I act, what I like and don't like, how I react to things, and what motivates me. So why not take the power out of someone else's hands and give that power back to myself.

I can choose to be happy or sad. So why would I choose sad...